The True Story of How I Became An East German Spy, Arsonist and Terrorist Subversive
My first duty station in Baumholder, Germany in 1981
When I got to my first duty station in Germany … first day, first hour, the dope dealers and black marketeers decided I was too clean cut, too good looking and too honest to be an enlisted soldier like everybody else. They gathered around me while I unpacked my duffel bag and spoke about me out loud, trying to intimidate me the instant I arrived. Some of them were behind me whispering into my ear. They stopped just short of death threats.
“You look like CID (Criminal Investigation Division) to me private. You look like an officer who is trying to pass himself off as an enlisted man. You need to swing your little ass around and march right back off post because nobody here is buying it. You too easy to spot and too obvious.”
A Senior Staff Sergeant who had done two tours in Vietnam was the worst of them, having that rank and being very explicit about what was going to happen to me. These guys had guilty consciences because they were all tied up in some very ugly business. They were seeing military police undercover everywhere because they knew what was going to happen to them if they got caught. They would do hard time at Leavenworth. Therefore even when they weren’t one hundred per cent sure, they nevertheless would test you to see if they could flush you out.
The Staff Sergeant took a long draw on a cigarette and blew the smoke over at me. “Be terrible if you wake up to a blanket party but that happens a lot to snitches around here. Be warned, Private Blakemore, it’s better for you to shove off and go back where you came from.”
Another private first class pointed to my duffel bag and suggested they search it. He said they might find some evidence I was CID and then could be certain. The Staff Sergeant waved him off, like even he knew they might be going a little too far. After he said this, another soldier jumped up on my bunk behind me and started chimping out, hooting and pretending to snarl at me. I had trouble believing this complete breakdown in discipline could prevail in any military anywhere. It had the feel of an open air mental asylum.
When I had enlisted back in Virginia, my father had been a realistic man about it all. He warned me he had heard some things and he told me that the Army wasn’t what it used to be. My Dad said they had lowered standards in 1969 and then 1974 and he told me half the people in it were drawn from the very gutter of the United States, only qualifying because they could respond to verbal commands and march in single file.
Most of this crap had blown over within a few weeks … but it led in a direct line of causality to getting me branded as an arsonist who tried to blow up the fuel dump in the motor pool … the sort of conviction that could get you a couple decades in a military prison. Remember, in the military you’re guilty if somebody who outranks you makes the allegation. Supposedly you will be afforded an opportunity to prove your innocence but that’s just the way it is described on paper. The reality is - just like modern day America - they can put you away for anything and your guilt or innocence has nothing to do with it. It’s who you know who will vouch for you.
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